FREE LINDSAY

Sunday Afternoon I Noticed This Cute Blonde. She Looked Mad Familiar So I Had Asked Her a Simple But Personal Question. "By Any Chance Is Your Name Kate?" She Looked At Me a Little Perplexed And Then Smiled a Some What Shy Smile And Said "Yes". Sure Enough It Was The Infamous Kate Majors. The Temporarily Black Listed Writer Was At My Job Ordering Some Grub. She Was Really Sweet & Seemed Some What Intrigued That I Had Recognized Her All By Herself. See Ms. Majors Has Had Notorious Boyfriends In The Last Few Years. Which Happened To Get Her Fired From Star Magazine. Which Really Blows Because She Seemed Like a Nice Enough Person To Really Choose Love Over Her Career. Love Is Blind And She Happened To Make The Obviously Wrong Choice.

At The Time My Job was Packed and I Was Running Around Trying To Get Orders Ready and Still Talk To This DILF About Anchorman With His Son. I was Wearing a Silk Teal Jump Suit, Nerd Glasses and a Gold Rope Chain, Ya Know a Waitress Uniform. I Still Continued To Have Some Small Talk with Kate. I Asked If She was Still Writing To Which She Replied "I Freelance From Time To Time But Now We're Working On a Reality Show". Girlfriend Is a Pro. She Saw an Opportunity To Give Me Some Deep Dish And I Applaud You Kate. Well Played.



While I Was Packing Some Salads Here Comes In Michael Lohan. I've Seen Him Around In The Hamptons For a Few Years. He Looked Exactly How I Excepted He Would In The Summer Time. Jeans, Black Beater and Long Island Tattoos All Over His Arms.

He Had Tried To Grab My Attention Because He Had Already Got Kate Pasta From Another Place And Wanted To Know If We Could Cancel Her Order. I Said No.

Now I'll Tell You Why. A Few Years Ago I Was at 7eleven To Purchase a Burrito. I Saw Him Walk In And I Had Asked If He Was "Michael Lohan" He Said "Yes". I Drunkly Told Him How I Loved Everything He Does And Think He's The Next Sylvester Stallone. I Was Rocking My Bubble Bee Sweater And Looked Like a Yellow Riddler. Oh Yeah and It Was Like 2 AM. He Said He Liked What Was Going On With Me Too. Then Asked Me What I Was Getting And I Said "A Spicy Burrito It's Super Dope" He Smiled. Thinking I Earned His Complete Trust And Admiration I Asked If He'd Buy My Snack. He Said No To Which I Said "Wonderful" And Had Bounced Outta There Like a Newborn Baby. He Then Chased Me Down RT 27 In His Silver Mercedes.......Best Night In March Ever.

While Was Still Running The Operations Behind The Counter Kate Introduced Michael To Me. We Shook Hands And Talked About How Well I Could Multitask To Which I Said "No I'm Just Good With Me Hands". No I Told Them My Mom Owned a Thai Food Restaurant For 17 Years And That This Was Nothing To What I've Done In The Past.

After Packing Their Food I Looked Into Michael's Eyes And Told Him How I've Been Praying For Lindsay And How I Really Hope She Can Pull Through This Really Difficult Time In Her Life. How I Could Related Because I'd Been In The Clink. But Then Again Everyone I Know That's Epic Has Been To Jail Like It's Not That Big Of a Deal. "Because I Know I When I Spent That Night In Jail For Aggravated Assault. I Said To Myself "I Am Never Ever Gonna Date Rape Anyone Again" - We'll Go With An Anonymous Author On That One.

So Michael Said He Was Headed To LA On Monday To Help Stop What Was Happening. He Honestly Seemed Like a Concerned Dad. In The Past I'd Like It Was Just a Stunt. But What I could Tell From The Tone In His Voice He Was An Upset Father. Sure He May Have Made Mistakes In The Past and Wasn't Around. But Lindsay Is An Emotionally Stunted Person Abusing Drugs. Even If She Was To Be Clean Her Brain Isn't Fully Fixed From The Years Of Abuse. But Her Breast Look Amazing.

Anyway Lindsay Is Still Battling Her Addictions, The Media, The Courts and Sadly Her Dad. Coming From Someone That Lost Their Dad At a Young Age I'd Wish My Dad Would Come Back And Save Me Today. I Feel Like The Grudge She Has For Him Is Her Issues With Authority. He's One Of The Only People That Thinks She Needs Help For Her Own Good. If He Does Get a Reality Show In The Future I'd Say It's Only Because He Needs The Money To Pay Dina For Child Support And Maybe That Mystery Love Child.
But From My Short Encounter With Him and Kate on Sunday, He Seemed Like a Concerned Father and Not a Famewhore Like He Comes Off on Camera.


So Lindsay Is Going To Jail On Tuesday And I Really Hope I Can Write Her a Letter. She'll Be In Her Cell 23 Hours a Day. I Think a Letter From Me Could Be Encouraging. I Want Her To Know I Still Love Her And Want Her To Stop Pussyfooting Her Career and Her Life.


@Daddyissues & @anddyRadio Discuss the Truth about Debbies from daddy issues on Vimeo.