Shorty Wanna Ride With Me?

Get Distracted With Me

Things I'm Furious About

Karl Slover Died After I Declared My Love For Him.........



Oliva Munn Is Fucking Annoying. She Wrote A Fucking Book. Not A Novel But A Biography. Ballsy For A Dumb Slut. I'll Write More About This Snaggle Vagina. I Have A Full Rant.

Jessica Simpson Is Finally Admitting She's Pregnant. How Many Months Is She? 65 Months Along? That Baby Is Gonna Be HUGEEEEEE. Just Do What Christina Did. Just Keeeeeeeeep Getting FATTER. Anyone See Christina Last Night? She's Like The Blonde Snooki. Hey Snickers This Is What You Look Like If You Were 2 Inches Taller, Somewhat Talented And Blonde.
I'm Not Telling Bitches To Lose Weight. Just Wear Better Clothing.

Anyone Else Hear Kelly Osbourne Laughing Her Face Off? Did Anyone Else See Her Chicken Cutlet Pop Out? I Give Her Credit For Not Falling Or Forgetting Her Words To Her 30 Seconds Of Singing. Better Then What She Looked AT The Michael Jackson Tribute.....

I Still Haven't Seen Tower Heist.

The Wizarding World Of Harry Potter Has Olivanders Wand Making Shop In Hogsmeade. HOGSSSSSMEADE! Oh And The Wand For My Celtic Birthday Looked Like It Had Anal Warts. OH And The Whole Cast Was In Orlando While I Was There.....Missed A Weasly Sandwich. WHAT FUCK?
I'm Mean I Had A Wonderful Day. Don't Get Me Wrong But This Witch In The Gift Shop Coulda Just Let Me Be A Fool In Never Knowing The Truth. But I'm Pretty Sure Those Guys Would Think All American Girls Are Batshit Crazy If I Said A Single Phrase To Them.

Netflix Is Still To Expensive.

I'm Procrastinating Life.

White People That LOVE Thanksgiving.

I NEED SOME HELP!!!

Did YOU CUM YET? UGH Love This Jam. Makes Me Wanna Buy Expensive Pants Just To Throw Them Off!!! I Need Some SERIOUS HELP!...So Hot. Moist Even.

It Sucks To Be A Clam

"Clam Or Ham Whose Hunger?"- United States Of Tara

It's Come To My Attention That I Do NOT Want To Be A Clam When I'm Reincarnated. Those Little Fuckers Are FUCKED. They Live Their Lives Under The Soft Sand Then Assholes Or Worse SEA GULLS Dig Them Up And They Can't Do Anything About It. Then The Sea Gulls Drop Them On To The Road. Atleast The Sea Gulls I Fuck With Do. I Don't Fuck Around With Dump Divers. My Sea Gulls Eat Sea FOOD. Anyway. All I Have To Say Is Please Don't Cook Me.

Speak Before You Think

I'm Feeling This Cover Real Hard. Not Only Is Kanye's Ranting Real But I Feel It. Deep In My Soul. He's A Creative Mind And Our World Has Become This Mass Of Judgement. Let The Man Create, Make Some Dough And Fantasize About Music.

Throw Back Thrusday

I Just Wanna Fucking Live....Or Die. Which Ever Gets People Off My Back. I Get A Lot Of Good Charlotte Stuck In My Head. This Girl Danielle From My Acting Class From My Senior Year In High School Loved Me. Like Wanted Me To Sit On Her Face While I Smoked A Cigarette And Jammed About    Celebrity Bullshit. She Wanted In Like Tara Reid Wants To Get Into A Las Vegas Night Club Without Having To Carry A Dvd Box Set Of American Pie.

Anyway I Know I Make Terrible Decisions. Isn't That Good Enough That I Know Before I Do It, It's Bad? I Mean I Always Thought It Was The Thoughts That Counted. Not My Actions And Bruises.

Speaking Of Bruises....I"ve Been Bruise Free For A Week....Wait A Minute. I've Been Burn Free....Okay I Am Full Of Shit.

PS Benji Madden You Can Sooooooo Tear This Ass UP!