Some Great Dick Shots Were All Over The Internet This Year. Thanks To Websites Like IsAnyoneUp.com and WorldStarHipHop.com. We Got To See Chris Brown And Gabe Saporta. Or We Can Thank "Artist" Like Soulja Boy Twitpicing Himself.....Anyway Thanks Guys. Pete Wentz Is Nothing But Jealous.
Dirt Nasty Get It Together!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Things My Mom Says
I've Been Tweeting The Weird Things My Mom Says For A Few Years. But If You Read My Tweets It's Predominately About Sex So I'm Sure You Have No Idea What I'm Even Talking About. So After All The Crazy Stuff She's Said In The Last 24 Hours Alone. I've Decided To Write A Few Of Her Gems Down Here.
What She Has To Say About The Music Industry :
Eminem Has Such A Smooth Yet Spicy Voice. Like Cinnamon.
That Stephanie Girl? I Don't Like Her. She Looks Like An Alien With Vagina Lips.
(Fun Fact: She Scribbles Out Her Face In Every Magazine She Has)
On Athletes
He Looks Like Aladdin. You Know One Of Those Disney Princes.
I Hate Him. He's So Inmature. He Throws Kim Around. What An Asshole, He Lost Her Earrings In The Ocean.
(I Told Her I'd Let Him Throw Me Around. She Didn't Talk To Me For The Rest Of The Night)
That's Only From The Last Few Days. I'm Sure Our Two Christmas Dinners Will Really Pick It Up A Notch.
What She Has To Say About The Music Industry :
Eminem Has Such A Smooth Yet Spicy Voice. Like Cinnamon.
That Stephanie Girl? I Don't Like Her. She Looks Like An Alien With Vagina Lips.
(Fun Fact: She Scribbles Out Her Face In Every Magazine She Has)
On Athletes
He Looks Like Aladdin. You Know One Of Those Disney Princes.
I Hate Him. He's So Inmature. He Throws Kim Around. What An Asshole, He Lost Her Earrings In The Ocean.
(I Told Her I'd Let Him Throw Me Around. She Didn't Talk To Me For The Rest Of The Night)
That's Only From The Last Few Days. I'm Sure Our Two Christmas Dinners Will Really Pick It Up A Notch.
Terrible Tips For The Holidays
Here's A Little Video I Did Dishing Out Some Pretty Awful Advice To Party Guests And Hosts.
Monday, December 19, 2011
Talented Kids
I Can't Have Kids Of My Own. So I've Adopted Amazing Children On The Way.
One Of My Amazing Children Was In Grease With Me When I Was Still In High School. Not Only Is He An Amazing Singer. My Boy Can Sing And Dance Better Then Usher. Oh And Karate Chop A Mofo.
I Love My Boys So Much. My Daughter Has The Ability To Pull It Out But The Boys Truly Love Mommy. Here's A Little Holiday Ditty My Baby Ape Did For Me.
ilove Jason Gettling
One Of My Amazing Children Was In Grease With Me When I Was Still In High School. Not Only Is He An Amazing Singer. My Boy Can Sing And Dance Better Then Usher. Oh And Karate Chop A Mofo.
I Love My Boys So Much. My Daughter Has The Ability To Pull It Out But The Boys Truly Love Mommy. Here's A Little Holiday Ditty My Baby Ape Did For Me.
ilove Jason Gettling
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Where Are My Feet Suppose To Take Me
Here's One Of My Favorite New York Bands GONZO JONES Playing A Personal Anthem Of My Life. These Funky Guys Are Phenomal Performers And Musicians. I Used To Dropped Everything With Little To No Money Hop The Train. Party All Night At One Of Their Shows....Crawl Back Onto The LIRR
And Work At 10 AM In East Hampton. Smelling Like Scott Disick's Balls...Which I Imagine Would Smell Like Foreign Oils, Sweat And Vodka.
Holiday Gasp!
That's SNL's Weekend Update's New York Tourist Correspondent Stefan. This Is SNL's Holiday Card. Courtesy Of My Friend TJ Mannix.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Friday, December 9, 2011
Perfect Bitch
Stephanie March Is Best Known For Her Role On Law & Order: SVU. As District Attorney Alex Calbot. I'm Watching Head Of State. She's In It. I'm Not Really Paying Her Attention Because She's Just Not That Person That's Blowing Me AWay.
{Sidenote: 1) I Miss Bernie Mac 2) How Ironic Is It Head Of State Is ON HBO After Herman Cain Suspended His Campaign? BAHAHAHAH}
Back To The Snoozefest That Is Stephanie March. She's Married To Ginger Celebrity Chef Bobby Flay. So She Gets Publicity Whenever He Opens A New Burger Joint. She's So Boring To Me. I Love Her For Her Plainness And Her Ability To Play A Lawyer Or Politician
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
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