Royal BJ

Royal Wedding

Good Touch, Bad Touch, Restraining Order

Cookie The Ticklish Penguin Is My New Ringtone. It Reminds Me Of The Noise This Stupid Bitch Made When She Drank Tequila For The First Time. Awee Middle School....

Rap Battling

So This Tuesday I'm Making My Rap Debut By Rap Battling At Real Quick For Fun. Which Is Going To Be An Epic Night. I'm Going To Get REAAAL Weird And All My Favorite MEN Will Be There For Hosting Duties. Check Out The Event Here. Should Be A Night To Remember Or Have The Internet Remind Me Afterwards.

C MaSheen

So My 67 Year Old Thai Mother Ditched Me Again This Weekend. She Ended Up Going To See Charlie Sheen. This Is Literally The 10th Time She's Gone And Done Something Cool Without Me This Year. She Went To See P!nk This Year Anddddd I Could Have Met Lamar Odem With Her A Few Years Ago....I Could Have Been On E! With My Crazy Family Ruining Lamar's Sleep At Night.  I Hope Charlie Was This Good Last Night.

Charlie Sheen's Winning Recipes from Charlie Sheen

Introducing FUSCHIA!

It's Hard Not To Love Manila Luzon. She's Fierce, Funny And Frank. Her Fashion Sense Is Sickening And Best Part My Girl IS AZN! Loves It. She Puts The Gay In Geisha. I've Been Catching Up On My Drag Race Lately And I Had The Great Please Of Finding The Man I'm Going To Marry. Matt Mcmanus Was One Of The Jocks That Was Transformed Into A Fishy Fishy Sister. And One Of My Favorite Heather's Was Teamed Up With Mcmanus. (I'd Let Put His Mcmanus In My Anus) HA.

So Matt My Future Ex Husband Is Really Fucking Funny. I Fell In Love The Moment He Said "Hard". Then He Continued To Make Me Scream Out Loud With His Body Language And Witty Come Backs. I Want Him To Let Me Dress In Up And Bang Me While He's In Drag. Is That A Little Too Much Info? It's Not Like I Haven't Done It Before. Stop Judging Me.

Entrances Are Everything GIRRRRRRL

I Really Loved This Episode I'm Kinda Pissed I Allowed Myself To Get So Behind On Drag Race. It's Basically My Tranny Bible. If Your Going To Learn How To Be A Fully Tucking Tran Tran Hook Hook Matt Had One Of The Best Teachers.

How Can YOU NOT FUCKING LOVE THIS GUY? He Reminds Me Of These Guys From My High School. They Were The All American Athletes Yet Were So Flipping Funny. Those Two Things Hand In Hand Make Me So Moist. Matt Is Like If Ferris Bueller And Michael Phelps Had A Buttbaby.

Lemme Just Lay Down Some Epic Shots Of Manilla Before I Leave You.

This Is How Nature Should Be Narrated

I LOVE THIS!


Crown Eagle Vs The Water Chevrotain

I Put The FUN In Funeral

I Know Someday I'll Die. But I Hope It's From Something Epic Like Crush By WWE Wrestler In A Sex Act Gone Right. I Even Have A Letter Written Out Stuffed Into All My Pillow Cases Just For That Occasion. Anyway Ryla Found A SATC Clip That Reminded Me Of How I'd Like To Be Remembered.

Not Only Does Lexi Remind Me Of Myself And The Rest Of Team Trash But My Current Feeling Towards New York As Well. Bleh. Everyone Is Quitting Smoking Because It's Expensive But If You Ask One Of Your Asshole Friends They'll Say It's For Health Reasons. Oh REALLY? Is This The Same Asshole Friend That Only Drinks Soy Milk And Wont Touch Red Meat??? Yet They'll Do A Fat Rail Of Coke Off The Bathroom Floor In Southside Because It Brings Back Memories? Ugh Sooooo Over That BB.

When New York Comes Back To Life Maybe I Wont Dream About My Funeral.



I'd Rather Be Remembered As The Loud Mouth Filthy Ride Or Die Bitch That I Am. Sure I've Grown Up And Made Changes In My Life But You Can't Kill Herpes. HA!


Probably Should Line My Coffin With Lead, Call The Police Ahead To Keep The Protesters At A Safe Distance, Hire My Favorite Trannies To Perform A Fantastically Rehearsed Mash Up Of "All That She Wants" By Ace Of Base And "Be My Lover" By La Rouche. Oh And Slash Had To Be There. I Don't Want Him To Perform Unless He Has The Bronx Cobra Around His Neck.