I've Been Told By Everyone I've Ever Discussed My Love Life With That I Make Terrible Choices For Myself. I Don't Know What's More Obvious, I'm A Fag Hag Or That Charlie Sheen And I Desperately Need To Go Rehab.
I'm Compiling A List Of Actors, Characters And Artist That Get Me Going. I Should Warn You That I'm A Total Creep And Attract The Creepiest Creepsters Around. It's Like I'm New Girl At Your Middle School And You Wanna Finger Blast Me Or Fight Me. Luckily For You I Want BOTHHHHH!
So This Year's Number One Canidate For Worst Crush Goes To American Horror Story's Own Tate Langdon. Tate Is A Psychopath, Serial Killing Rapist. What Can I Say Besides The Fact That I Love Him. I Want Him To Be In Love With Me And Lock Me Up In His Murder Castle.
He's Complex Mommy Issues Only Make Me Want To Hold Him More. Like Somehow I Could Fix Him, That My Heart Could Fix Everything That's Fucked Up In His Head. He's Like That Dog The Sleeps At The Junkyard To Protect All The Secrets Inside. He's Tough, Misunderstood And Just Needs The Right Female To Take Him Home And Cuddle With Him. Sure He's Killed A Gay Couple In 2009, Killed 15 Students At His School In 1995 And Dumped Gasoline All Over His Mother's Boyfriend And Threw A Lit Match At Him. But Doesn't This All Just Scream....Mom Please Stop Being A Selfish Bitch And Love Me?
Sure Evan Peters The Actor That Plays Tate Is Adorable. I Don't Love Evan. I Love Tate. He's Dangerous,Impulsive, Has No Remorse For The Horrorable Things He's Committed Alive And Dead And He's In Love With Someone Named Violet.
Violet Is A Pet Name My Ex Gave Me From The Movie Pretty Baby. Which Is About A Baby Prostitute In New Orleans That Ends Up Marrying An Older Photographer. Violet Is 9 Years Old And Her Husband Is In His Late 30's. My Ex Was In His 40's And I Just Had Turned 21.
But Tate Only Committed Majority Of His Crimes Out Of Uncontrollable Hormones And Evil Sprites That Fuck With His Head. UGH I Wouldn't Mind If He Fucked My Head.
Terrible Crush Number 2 Has To Be Paul Bernardo. I Figure I'm Already Talking About A Fictional Seriel Killer I Should Talk About A Real One I'm Obsessed With.
Paul And His Wife Karla Committed 2 Terrible Murders And 1 Accidental Death Of Karla's Sister.
Karla Was Seduced By Paul's Charm And Big City Image, Soon After Donating His DNA Sample He Dipped Outta Scarborough And Moved Into Karla's Home With Her Parents And Little Sister. After A Few Months Paul Let's Karla Know He Was In Fact The Scarsborough Rapist Because The Media Totally Had His Sketch And All Of Paul's Friends Would Joke About Him Being In Fact The Rapist.
Karla Being The Dumb Whore That She Was At Age 17 Was Totes Down With Paul Being A Rapist And Manilupalator. When It Came To The Point Paul Had Asked If He Could Rape Her Little Sister Karla Didn't Even Bat An Eye...She Participated. Stealing Drugs From The Vet's Office She Worked At She Drugged And Raped Her Sister Along With Mr. Bernardo. Oh Did I Mention They Video Taped It? Like With One Of Those 20 LB Video Cameras That HAD To Be Mounted On A Tripod.
Karla Being The Vet Tech Should Have Known What She Was Doing, But I Personally Think She Didn't Care About The Situation And Overdosed Her Sister. Paul Being Freaked Out Called 911.
BLah Blah Blah Karla And Paul Get Married. Kill 1 Teen Disember Her Body And Dispose Her Parts In Concrete Blocks Around The River Banks Near Niagra Falls......Several Weeks Later While Away On Their Honey Moon The Body Parts Are Discovered.
Being The Man That He Is Paul Blames Karla For Not Knowing The Waterlevels Shift. To Make It Up To Paul, Karla Helps Him Abduct Another Teen Girl From A Church Parking Lot In Broad Day Light....
The Cockiness Of This Whole Story Makes Me So Uneasy. That Sucha Confident Man That Was Extremely Well Liked By Other Like Minded Professionals Was So Evil.
He Appreciated Karla's Efforts, After Another Girl Went Missing And Discovered....Paul Was Furious With Karla's Lack Of Perfection With Disposing The Bodies He Turned He's Hatred Of Women On To Karla. Her Complete Submission To Him Proved His Point That Women Were Nothing But Whores. Sick I Know.
After Karla Escaped Paul's Wrath In Their Little Death Cottage She Went To The Police. Covered In Two Big Black Eyes She Confesses Paul Was Behind The Two Dead Teens Deaths. Not Only Did Karla Get A Great Deal From The Police She Stated There Were Videos Showcasing Paul's Crimes. Blaming All Of The Fault Of The Grizzly Rape And Murders On Her Spouse.
The Thing Is After 3 Months Of Searching The House The Videos Were Never Found. Karla Took An Amazing Deal For Her Parts In The Crimes...Unbeknownst To The Cops That Karla Was Very Much A Lot Part. In Fact She Got A Sexual Thrill From The Menacing Things She Did. It Wasn't Until After The Deal Was Sealed Did Karla Mention Paul Was Also Behind The Brutal Poisoning Of Her Little Sister.
Paul Panicked He Was Facing 3 Murder Charges,Countless Rape Charges In Various Counties And His Soon To Be Ex Wife Was Leaving Him To Hang....What's A Psychopathic Killer To Do? He Told His Lawyer Where He Hid The Incriminating Video Tapes....Which Were Hidden In The Ceiling Tiles In The Couples Bathroom. Pretty Sneaky Sis.
Karla's Role Was Shown To The Full Extent, But Her Deal Was Already Done. I Believe She Got 12-15 Years In Total While Paul Rots In A Canadian Prison. While Paul Still Fights For Freedom Karla Has Been Out Free, Having An "Affair" With A Model....She Got Married, Had A Baby All While Using Another Name....
YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!
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| Don't Cry Tate...Because I Love You |
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