Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Things My Mom Says

I've Been Tweeting The Weird Things My Mom Says For A Few Years. But If You Read My Tweets It's Predominately About Sex So I'm Sure You Have No Idea What I'm Even Talking About. So After All The Crazy Stuff She's Said In The Last 24 Hours Alone. I've Decided To Write A Few Of Her Gems Down Here.


What She Has To Say About The Music Industry :



Eminem Has Such A Smooth Yet Spicy Voice. Like Cinnamon.


That Stephanie Girl? I Don't Like Her. She Looks Like An Alien With Vagina Lips.
(Fun Fact: She Scribbles Out Her Face In Every Magazine She Has)

On Athletes




He Looks Like Aladdin. You Know One Of Those Disney Princes.


I Hate Him. He's So Inmature. He Throws Kim Around. What An Asshole, He Lost Her Earrings In The Ocean.
(I Told Her I'd Let Him Throw Me Around. She Didn't Talk To Me For The Rest Of The Night)

That's Only From The Last Few Days. I'm Sure Our Two Christmas Dinners Will Really Pick It Up A Notch.

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